one day at a time...

I’m not so sure if I can be a stay home mom.  

Since Friday, I’ve been off from work and so far, I’ve been having a little trouble (o.k. more like I’m going crazy) being home all day.  

It’s getting to the point where I’m feeling depressed.  I can’t handle this.  Don’t get me wrong.  I like being a home… more than most.  But with all the things I have to get done which have been put off for so long and now have become too overwhelming.  

I put too much pressure on myself to get things done.  That’s because I’m used to it at work.  Hurry, hurry, rush, rush… everything has to get done by the end of the day.  That approach definitely does not work in the home place.  Nope.    I have to take time to organize not only my thoughts but also my house in general.  Being home makes me realize that it’s in a chaotic state.  I got too much “junk” in every room.  I need to get rid of things that are just making clutter and organizing the things I want to keep.  

I have done this in the past.  Just when I think I have it under control, I turn around and I’m back where a started.  How did everything get out of hand? What the…?  I almost want to cry…!  

There is this feeling of frustration that begins to creep up on me.  And I ask myself, “Why does it always happen to me?”  I’m supposed to be on vacation.  Remember?  Why is it when I take time off instead of relaxing there’s more pressure, stress and work to do.  It almost makes me wish I were back at work (what does that tell you?).

I know what you’re thinking.  How come the hubby and kids aren’t helping you?  To answer that question, my husband is too busy with work and other activities to do much around the house.  As far as the kids, I do have them help clean (well, once in a while).  And that’s my problem…I’m not consistent with them.  I ask them to do chores one day and then do not follow up or continue to have them do it everyday.  Plus, I start feeling guilty because they too are off on vacation.  And if I’m feeling this way, imagine them.  

I have to keep reminding myself, don’t worry…just take one day at a time… one room a day to get things organized.  I can do this… I have to think positive.  

And now to end this on a good note… I’m getting a new dryer delivered tomorrow.  Yay!  That just made my day!