Halloween party...

Last night we went to one of the best Halloween parties ever. My sister went all out for this one. She put straw all over the house (it’s going to be a bitch trying to clean that up!) She decorated the walls with glow in the dark markers; fake bugs and cobwebs. She had a skeletal punch bowl with a drink that looked like real blood and, of course, the skeleton goblets. It was just awesome! We got there about 8 o’clock and there were only a few people. My sister was starting to worry that no one was going to show up. But by 10 o’clock they started trickling in… a couple here, and a group of people there, pretty soon the house was filling up quickly. Within moments, the house was full of people. Some went outside to the backyard where my sis and her boyfriend had also decorated with tombstones, ghosts, and a ghoul hanging from a tree.

Everyone came dressed up in all sorts of cool, scary and even funny costumes. My sister was dressed like the scarecrow from “Jeepers Creepers”; my sister’s boyfriend was dressed as the scary guy from “Texas Chain Saw Massacre”. He would hide by the doorway and when people came in he would pop out and turn on his fake chain saw (that sounded like a real chainsaw) and scared the living crap out of everyone! I wish I had a video camera to record the funny and scared expressions on everyone’s face when they heard the chain saw roar!

But the best costume would go to my other sister. She wore one of “Martin Lawrence” character… “Otis the Security Guard.” She was so hilarious. She had the moves… she really played up on that character. And when "Otis" saw a girl on sexy costume, "he" would say to them, "Ho’d on a minute… I have the right to search." And "he" began feeling up on them. Then "he" would say, "Damn girl… you’re scrumftious! " (as he licked his fingers.) "Ol' Otis" had everyone laughing!

Later, I joined my hubby, who was outside with my two kids, and a couple of friends who were getting ready to go home. And sure enough… we had a visitor…someone had called the cops to complain about the loud music (they had a DJ) and yes the music was playing loud! The good thing was that the officer was nice. He soon realized that it was a Halloween party and he just gave us a warning. As he was talking to my hubby, “Otis the Security Guard” comes out… oh, shit! What is "he" going to pull next? “Ol’ Otis” comes up to the officer and says, “Man why you all up on ma terratory?” I’m nashional sicuraty (as she's flashing her fake badge)! I hope you're not goin' to tow ma car, we’re second cuzins man...I’m almost a sherwiff you kno', I’m gettin’ there. I got everythin’ unda contro’. You’re embarrassin’ me man! Yeah, I kno’ you got a gun. I got one too... I just left it inside because I came outside to take a piss." The officer looked at her and you could tell he wanted to bust out laughing, but he was pretty smooth and in control...he just smiled. She then said to him, “Bro, be cool… I’m Five O, you and I are family!” and she proceeded to show him a little dance move and wriggled her big ol’ butt at him. The officer couldn’t help it and he soon began to laugh with us. The officer then said to "Ol' Otis", "you should come over to my station." And “Otis” responded, “Well call me… we’ll talk it ova’ coffee and doe nuts."

You had to be there….it was so funny!

While all this was happening, more and more people were showing up for the party. After the officer gave his warning and left, we too decided it was time to go. They did turn the music down a little bit. I wonder how many more people came by and how late they stayed up partying. I just hope they didn’t get another visit from the cops!

Chiquis is coming home...

I got a call today from the woman that took Chiquis to her new home. Oh, oh…something told me this was going to happen. After more than two weeks had past, I was sure Chiquis was there to stay. But sure enough, I was wrong! She called to tell me she was going through a lot at home and work (she used to work from home). She recently got a promotion and now she has to spend more time outside her home. She’s also having a hard time with her four kids. She needs to find a full time babysitter. And because of all that Chiquis has now become a problem. She hates to give her up but the fact is that poor little Chiquis has to spend too much time in her kennel and her kids are no longer as enthusiastic about her as when they first brought her home. I explained to her that it was exactly what I went through with my kids.

So it looks like Chiquis is coming home. Good thing Chiquis will have Beau and Coqueta to play with and keep her company. I just don’t know how this is going to work out for us. I was already used to not having her around and was feeling a little at ease. Oh well, what could I do? I told her if she didn’t want Chiquis, I would take her back!

World Champs...!

You don't have to be a baseball fan to share my pride in the remarkable achievement of Chicago White Sox. They beat Houston Astros in four straight games to win the first world series championship since 1917!

GO SOX!!!

http://www.chicagotribune.com/

http://www.suntimes.com/index/sports

My little girl...

Sitting here, with tears in my eyes… as I think back when my little girl was born.  She was so tiny and beautiful.  I thank the Lord every day for giving me such a precious child.  

I’ll never forget when the nurse took her away from me to give her a check up.   While they were wheeling her away, I heard her cry… it was more like a “meow”.  She sounded like a little kitten.  She never really cried.  

When I brought her home from the hospital, she was the sweetest baby.  She never kept me up at night.  She would make a little kitty sound and I knew I had to feed her.  Once I did so, she would sleep the whole night through.  There was only one time when she did keep me up and that was when she got sick.  That day was the worst day of my life!  She cried all night long and there was nothing I could do for her.  So I walked her and tried to comfort her.  I’ll never forget feeling so lost and useless!  My heart ached and I cried with her…

We used to take her out with us to restaurants and people would come by our table and comment on what a wonderful baby she was.  She never cried and was well behaved.  I was so proud of her.  When I finally went back to work (I used to work with my husband at his office), I would take her with me everyday.  No one would even know she was there.  The only time she would actually cry (more like a whimper) was when she needed to be fed.  My husband’s clients would notice her and they were amazed at how good my baby girl was.  She would not make a sound…

Today, while I was preparing dinner, my son was doing his homework in the kitchen table and my husband was sitting at the table helping him with his assignment.  Suddenly, my daughter comes up to me with tears in her eyes and says… “Mom, I think I got it!”  I looked at her and for a moment time stood still.  I saw it in her eyes.  I knew exactly what she meant.  For an instant, I wasn’t sure what to do or say.  She stood there waiting and I turned to my husband who lowered his head and my son who wanted to know what was going on.    I realize I had to say something so I took her to the room.  She began to cry.  Even though she already knew “it” was coming and we’ve been preparing for this moment, it still came as a surprise.  I consoled her and tried to explain to her that it was normal.  It’s something every girl has to go through in life in order to become a woman.  She said, “Mom, I don’t want to grow up yet!”  “I know baby”, I say. I began to tell her of my little story when “I got mine” and we began to laugh and cry together.  

Finally, she went upstairs to her room.  I told her to come down so she can eat dinner and she said, “No, mom, I’m embarrassed, I feel like Dad and my brother are going to stare at me.”   She said, “Mom, I don’t want my brother to make fun of me!”   I tried to convince her that it was not the case, but she insisted in staying upstairs in her room.

I came downstairs and prepared a plate for her.   My son said, “Mom, I’ll take it up for her.”  He took the plate, got a glass and filled it with milk.  He then took a napkin and put it on his arm (like a waiter) and took it up to her.  When he came down, I asked him, “Do you know what’s going on with your sister?” And he says, “Yes mom, I know”.   I thought he was so sweet!

I just can’t believe it!   My little girl… she’s growing up!

reflection...

I was staring at myself in the mirror. I’ve never been one to take the time to fix my hair. But as the little girl stared back at me, I knew I had to do something with it. My hair was long and stringy. My bangs were also getting a little long in the front so I decided to brush them to one side. I can’t remember if I used hairspray or some type of gel but I remember it being sticky. I kept brushing and brushing until my bangs were flat … actually they were stuck to my forehead. When I was finally through brushing my hair, I went outside to join my mom, my aunt and my cousin who were sitting in the front steps talking. They turned around to look at me and their reaction was one of “what the… what did you do to your hair?” And then they started laughing and I mean they were laughing hard to the point of tears. They made comments which they thought were funny about my hair but I thought they were hurtful and mean. I ran back inside the house and began to cry. I guess what hurt the most was that my own mother made fun of me. I grabbed the brush and brushed my hair until I thought it was going to fall off. I’ll never forget that awful feeling and how hurt I was. I was six years old.

Looking back now, I think that’s where it all began…my low self-esteem (among other things). I’m never comfortable or satisfied with how I look. I don’t have that many pictures of myself for that reason.

Recently, I came across an old picture of me… I was 22. I stared at the photo in amazement. Was this really how I looked? I couldn’t believe that was me in the picture. I actually looked pretty good and I didn’t look fat. So why did I believe that I was back then?

(Sigh)…wish my weight now is what it was at age 22.

Today, as I looked in the mirror, again became upset with the image it reflected of me. I can’t believe how old I looked, not because of my age, but because of the way I feel inside (which also reflects on the way I wear my clothes)… that’s because I’m always trying to hide and cover up. I’ve come to the realization that no matter what I wear or how I look, I’ll never be happy with myself.

I need to do something… but where do I begin? How do I begin? Every time I want to start an exercise routine or do something for myself, something always comes up. There’s always and excuse! I’m having a hard time (emotionally and physically) with things that are going on in my life. The sad part is that I know somehow this is going to affect my kids too. I don’t want them to grow up like I did…insecure and hating myself.

I heard a saying that goes something like this… “Love others as you would love yourself.” How can you possibly love someone, if you don’t love yourself? And how can you love yourself if you don’t make the time?

a walk down memory lane...

To those that remember (maybe not everything, but you'll get the gist) and those who are interested . . . Enjoy!

If you are old enough...take a stroll with me...close your eyes...and go back...before the Internet...before semiautomatics and crack...before SEGA or Super Nintendo... way back...

I'm talking' bout hide and go seek at dusk. Sitting' on the porch, Simon Says, Kick the Can, Red light, Green light. Lunch boxes with a thermos...chocolate milk, going home for lunch, penny candy from the store, hopscotch, butterscotch, skates with keys, Jacks, Mother May I? Hula Hoops and sunflower seeds, Whist and Old Maid and Crazy Eights, wax lips and mustaches, Mary Janes, saddle shoes and Coke bottles with the names of cities on the bottom, running through the sprinkler, circle pins, bobby pins, Mickey Mouse Club, Rocky & Bullwinkle, Fran & Ollie, Spin & Marty...all in black & white.

When around the corner seemed far away, and going downtown seemed like going somewhere.

Bedtime, climbing trees, making forts...backyard shows, lemonade stands, Cops and Robbers, Cowboys and Indians, sittin' on the curb, staring at clouds, jumping down the steps, jumping on the bed, pillow fights, getting "company," ribbon candy, angel hair on the Christmas tree, Jackie Gleason, white gloves, walking to church, walking to the movie theater, being tickled to death, running till you were out of breath, laughing so hard that your stomach hurt, being tired from playin' ... Remember that? Not steppin' on a crack or you'll break your mother's back...paper chains at Christmas, silhouettes of Lincoln and Washington... the smell of paste in school and Evening in Paris.

What about the girl that had the big bubbly handwriting, who dotted her "i's" with hearts?? The Stroll, popcorn balls, & sock hops...Remember when...there were two types of sneakers for girls and boys (Keds & PF Flyer) and the only time you wore them at school was for "gym." And the girls had those ugly uniforms.

When it took five minutes for the TV to warm up. When nearly everyone's Mom was at home when the kids got home from school. When nobody owned a purebred dog.

When a quarter was a decent allowance, and another quarter, a huge bonus. When you'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny.

When girls neither dated nor kissed until late high school, if then.

When your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces. When all of your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done, everyday and wore high heels.

When you got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, all for free, every time. And, you didn't pay for air. And, you got trading stamps to boot!

When laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box.

When any parent could discipline any kid, or feed him or use him to carry groceries, and nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it. When it was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents.

When they threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed...and did!

When the worst thing you could do at school was smoke in the bathrooms, flunk a test or chew gum. And the prom was in the auditorium and we danced to an orchestra, and all the girls wore pastel gowns and the boys wore suits for the first time and we stayed out all night.

When a '57 Chevy was everyone's dream car...to cruise, peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and people went steady and girls wore a class ring with an inch of wrapped dental floss or yarn coated with pastel frost nail polish so it would fit her finger.

And no one ever asked where the car keys were 'cause they were always in the car, in the ignition, and the doors were never locked. And you got in big trouble if you accidentally locked the doors at home, since no one ever had a key.

Remember lying on your back on the grass with your friends and saying things like "That cloud looks like a..."

And playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game. Back then, baseball was not a psychological group learning experience-it was a game.

Remember when stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals 'cause no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger.

And... with all our progress... don't you just wish...just once...you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace... and share it with the children of the 80's and 90's ...

Who can still remember Nancy Drew, The Bobsy Twins, The Hardy Boys, Laurel & Hardy, Howdy Doody and The Peanut Gallery, The Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows, Nellie Belle, Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk...as well as the sound of a reel mower on Saturday morning, and summers filled with bike rides, playing in cowboy land, baseball games, bowling and visits to the pool...and eating Kool-aid powder with sugar.

When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited a misbehaving student at home.

Basically, we were in fear for our lives, but it wasn't because of drive by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! But we all survived because their love was greater than the threat.

Didn't that feel good, just to go back and say, Yeah, I remember that!
(well, most of it anyway . . .)

Pop quiz...

This morning I was helping my daughter study for her vocabulary test.

These vocabulary words contained the words “ben”, “bene”, “bon”, “mal” and “male”, which words my daughter calls “the good and bad words”.

Here are a few words from her list:

“benevolent” kind; good-hearted; [Good she got that one right]

“malevolent” a word that describes a person or character who wishes bad things would happen to others; [o.k. keep going]

“benign” favorable; having a good effect; not harmful; [great]

“malignant” harmful; something bad enough that it could result in death when related to cancer; [she’s getting it…!]

And the final word is “benediction”. My daughter thinks about it for a moment then says:

“benediction: an addiction to something good.”

There ya go, now you have it!

Cartoons...

This morning my husband got up and made breakfast for us. While we were at the breakfast table, my son was asking my husband why he brought the movie “Robots” for him to watch. “That’s a baby movie”, my son says. My husband responded, “When I see you watching TV, you are always watching cartoons and I thought you might like this one.” My son proceeded to name the cartoons he watches (“Jimmy Neutron”; “The Simpson’s”; “Invader Zim”, “Kids Next Door” and others) which he believes “aren’t for babies”, half of them I’ve never even heard of or recognize. So I say, “When I was kid, I used to watch cartoons like “Tom & Jerry” and “Popeye”. We asked him if he knew who Popeye was and his response was, “Oh, yeah, it’s the pirate guy who eats his spinach right?” My husband and I started to laugh. Goes to show you the difference between our generations… God I feel old! And no, he’s not a pirate; he’s Popeye the Sailor Man! Toot toot!

Home cooking...

Yesterday, I actually cooked.  Yes, I said cooked as in C-O-O-K-E-D!  And I don’t mean putting a frozen dinner in the microwave either!

Since I was home all day, I decided to prepare a good home cooked meal.  I don’t know what got into me.  I guess the fact that it was cold and I felt like something warm and good to eat.  I’m not one to cook every day, and I never learned how to cook like my mother.  Now, I wish I had paid more attention when she tried to teach me.  I look inside my pantry and/or cupboard to see what I can find to make for dinner and when I don’t find what I need to prepare a dish, I’ll use that as an excuse not to cook and pick out a frozen dinner instead or order out.

This time, I put a pot of beans to cook and while the beans were on the stove, I prepared “carne y papas con chile colorado” (meat and potatoes with red chile).  I’m not sure how my mom makes it, but I tried my best and put my own spices.  I also made Mexican rice.  I couldn’t believe it took me almost two hours to prepare everything.  That’s a lot of time when you’re always in a rush.  By the time the beans finished cooking, everything else was ready to be served.  So I quickly made refried beans, as my daughter loves them.  I have to admit, this time, I truly amazed myself.  Everything came out pretty damn good!

I couldn’t wait for my husband to come home and surprise him with my delicious dinner.  But soon it started to get pretty late, so the kids and I ate dinner before everything got too cold.  Finally, I got tired of waiting for him and we all went upstairs to watch TV.  He didn’t come home until 9:30 p.m.  I heard him go to the kitchen and yell out “Wow!  Man this looks good!  What’s the occasion?”  I was already in bed and too tired to come down.  So he ate by himself.   When he came upstairs to bed, he said, “That was good! All that was missing were homemade flour tortillas!”  

Ya know, you just can’t have everything!

Boring day...

I went back to work after taking off yesterday due to my daughter being sick. She’s coughing up a little bit but she feels much better now, so I sent her off to school.

When I got to work, I had a pile waiting for me at my desk. Even though my boss is out of town for the week, I haven’t been able to catch up. Somehow it seems like I have MORE work to do!

When I log in my computer, my boss receives at least 50 e-mails, if not more, just in the morning alone. It took me over two hours just printing out the e-mails with attachments, organizing them by client and sending a few e-mails on his behalf. It’s amazing all the paperwork that’s involved. Not only are my hands dry and they feel like sandpaper, but I got a few paper cuts too! :(

And just when I think I have everything organized, I get another load of e-mails. My boss will probably have to spend a couple of days just going through them!

Before he left, he asked me to go through all his file cabinets and figure out which client files can be sent to the warehouse for storage. He’s been gone since last Tuesday and I have not had a chance to do so. He will be returning to work either Tuesday or Wednesday of next week, and I’m afraid I haven’t even gotten started on this project. What is he going to think? Oh, well…!

Today, I attended the “Extra Net” training. It was so boring! All eight of us tried to keep our eyes open and pretend we were interested but it was so hard. A few were yawning, including myself. There was one girl who actually fell asleep! We saw her and everyone started to laugh. I still don’t know what this program was all about. I hope I don’t have to use it! So much for learning something new!

Feeling lazy...

My daughter wasn’t feeling well last night so I decided she should stay home from school today.  And of course, I had to take the day off from work.  

Right now she’s upstairs napping.  So I’m trying to finish doing laundry, dishes and clean up the house a little bit.  But I’m getting real frustrated.  There is so much to do and I don’t know where to begin.  I’m not organized so it makes it even harder!  I’ve been up since 6:45 a.m. and I don’t think I’ve accomplished anything.  

Might as well take a break to jot down my thoughts.  

Yesterday we did not take our pet Beau to the vet to have him check out his hips.  My husband was upset the way he came back from the vet the other day so he decided he wasn’t going to take him.  So far, Beau is starting to look fine again.  He’s finally walking and moving around.  I don’t know if he somehow got hurt at the vet, or they kept him cooped up in a kennel for so long that his joints got stiff.  But he’s gotten better or maybe it’s the arthritis medication that I’ve been giving him.  Poor Beau, my old pal.  He’s getting too old!

Monday we had a family gathering or more like a farewell party for my grandma who left to go to Mexico on Tuesday.  She decided it was getting too cold for her to stick around any longer.  We had a good time.  Dinner was delicious!  My uncle made rib tips in some kind of red sauce and it was out of this world!  My aunt made “camarones a la diabla” which literally stands for “deviled shrimp” or “shrimp a la devil”.  The shrimp is cooked in butter and garlic and once they start turning pink, they add this spicy hot sauce (you can have it mild (by adding ketchup) or very hot according to your taste) and the shrimp comes out so gooood!!!

She also made “caldo de camarones” which is a fish and shrimp soup with lots of veggies.  It is very tasty and I’m not even a seafood lover.  I haven’t had that in so long that I was savoring every bite.  I don’t usually eat seafood at home since my hubby is allergic to shellfish.  Mmmm… but I could use another bowl of that soup right about now.  

Yes, the weather is changing.  It is cloudy and cold.  Makes me wish I could just stay in bed and do nothing.  

But I know there’s just too much to do.  Better get with it before I change my mind and go to bed instead…!

I have a feeling I'm going to be off tomorrow...

This morning my daughter complained of a sore throat. Over the weekend, my son had also been complaining of one too but he’s doing fine. I’ve been getting up with a sore throat myself but by mid morning it goes away. So I told her to get ready for school anyway. She would be fine right? Wrong! Later that morning my husband calls me at work and says “guess whom I had to pick up from school today?” “Oh, no…” I say. “Yes, your daughter whom you sent to school knowing she didn’t feel good!” Shit! I should have known better!

And of course, today, our practice group had an outing. It never fails, every time I make plans something goes wrong. Should I go or should I stay? I decided to go to our outing. After all my husband was already home with our daughter. He can take care of her for a day right? Then why do I feel so guilty…!

Originally, we were supposed to go on an architectural cruise (which was scheduled at 2:00 p.m.) but got canceled due to the weather being windy and cold. What a difference from yesterday. It was such a nice sunny day.

We ended up going to Navy Pier instead to have a late lunch. The company was good and the food was great. I was trying to have a nice time and I did (even though deep down I was feeling guilty because I was having a little fun! Should I have gone to be with my daughter instead? Does this make me a bad mother?)

Before you know it, it was getting late, some of the girls wanted to go walking around and go shopping while the other girls had to go back to the office. When I realized the time, (it was already 4:00 p.m.) I decided to go back with the girls to the office so I can catch my train (as it is it takes about 45 minutes to get home).

Once I got home, I went to check on my daughter. She does not have a fever... yet. But she felt warm and she sounded stuffy and complained about her throat. Let’s see how she wakes up the next day. I don’t know… something tells me I may have to take the day off tomorrow!

My dog Beau...

Yesterday morning, we took our pet Beau (who is 14 years of age) to the vet. He loves being outside in the back yard. So, of course, he’s gotten real filthy. He hates baths and he’s too big for me to try to do it in the house. And since it’s been getting cooler, I decided to take him to vet instead to get a bath and check out his eye.

He’s got a growth growing in the corner of his eye and it was started to look pretty bad. I dropped him in the morning and asked when I could pick him up. They told me he would be ready by 4:00 p.m.

Earlier, I received a phone call from each of the coaches indicating that my daughter had a soccer game at 4:00 p.m. and the other coach indicated that my son’s soccer game was at 3:45 p.m. and each games was at two different locations. My husband ending up giving my daughter and a couple of her teammates a ride while I caught a ride with one of my son’s teammate’s mom for his game. I knew I wasn’t going to be able to pick up Beau until after 5:00.

Once I got to the vet, he was telling me how Beau had problems with his legs and hips and how he has bad arthritis in the hip area. I knew he had signs of arthritis because when he gets up, it does take him a little longer to do so but he stretches his legs and starts walking. He also indicated that he does not recommend removing the growth from his eye since he’s and old dog and he may not come out of the surgery.

Well, when I he finally brought Beau out, Beau was practically crawling. He couldn’t use his hind legs. When we took him there he WAS walking and now he can’t even move his hind legs! What happened? He proceeded to explain to me that Beau is an old dog. He said that he had him in the water for a while when he was being bathed and how he’s also was in the kennel for a while so his joints are stiff. He gave me medication for his arthritis and medication for his eye. I was like, wait a minute! He wasn’t this bad!
He told me to give him his medication and that it would help him. I know my husband wasn’t happy about this either. He was like “I’m not taking him there again!

This morning, Beau did start to walk a little bit but not for long. He would take a few steps and then he would sit or drag his hind legs. It almost appears as if he hurt his hip or something, and he drags his hind legs. I don’t know. I’m not happy about this!

As I was typing this blog, I got a call from the vet asking me how he was doing. I explained to him that this was not normal for Beau. He still seems to be having trouble walking and even the way he sits. He sits with his two hind legs in front of him. No, something is definitely not right here! He told me to drop him off tomorrow so he can take a look at him again. I’m going to have to, even though my husband will not be happy about it. But I need an explanation as to why my poor Beau is in this condition!

I could just slap him...!

My husband has coached a girls team for the past three or four years now and we’ve gotten acquainted with most of the families of the team.

A couple of weeks ago, one of the moms asked my husband if they could use the (park) field, where the girls play, to celebrate her daughter’s b-day. I thought that was a great idea since the field is close by and yet out of the way and people won’t complain if music is played too loud or too many people are coming and going.

Later, my husband decided to mention to me that he had told our friend that, if she wanted to, she could have a party at our house in the basement (since a few days ago, it had been cold and raining). I was like, you said what?!!! Why would you do that?

Back in the day (I say that because that’s how it feels like at this time), we had a nice basement (it was clean and junk free!) We have had several good parties there, including an awesome Halloween party. But now, my house is a mess! Especially the basement! It is full of “crap”! I have too much and nowhere to put it so it goes in the basement. It has become a storage room and, at this time, it looks like one big junk room!


I told him I was upset with him, not because he invited them, but he did it without consulting with me first. He knows that there is much to do and, we haven’t got the time, especially to clean it out.

So anyway, fortunately, yesterday was the party and the weather was perfect. All the kids (and adults) ate, played games and just had plain fun!

But right before the party was over, another friend of ours mentioned that her daughter’s birthday was the next day and my husband, being the nice man that he is, says “we should have a party for her here and if it rains, we can do it our house!” I could not believe it! Didn’t we just have this discussion?

I was upset with my husband and I asked him why his insistence in making a party at our house. He said “Well, that’s the excuse we have always used to clean out the basement!” And you know what? He’s right! But then again, our basement wasn’t as bad as it is now.

Imagine if our friend had said yes… not only did we get home late last night but the next day my kids had soccer games in the morning and he had to go to work. So when were we suppose to have time to clean out the basement? He’s nuts!

In the end, it was decided that we’re going to have a surprise b-day party next week for my friend’s daughter at the field. Let’s just hope it doesn’t rain!

Whose smiling now...!

I was able to leave a little earlier from work today given that I didn’t take a lunch. Yay! And since, I arrived at school earlier than usual to pick up my kids, I decided to try out the hair salon that was a couple of blocks away. I’ve seen it before but, for some reason or another, I never checked it out.

So now was the perfect time to do so. The kids and I walked over to the hair salon and there were three ladies who seem pretty nice. One lady cut my daughter’s hair, while the other cut my son’s. Good, we’re going to be out of here in no time! I caught my reflection in the mirror, yikes! I need a haircut bad!!!! I might as well get one too. When my son was done getting his hair cut, he was actually pleased. So was I. He looked pretty good. The lady was amazed at how much hair he had and how thick and heavy it was. Just like his daddy!

The other lady finished with my daughter’s hair and my daughter was all smiles! She cut her long hair in layers. “All my friends have it cut like that too!” She says with a big grin on her face. Oh, boy, she’s becoming quite a little lady. She’s growing up!

I was last, and since I didn’t have enough $$$ with me, I just got a trim. Looks a lot better than the way I had it, that’s for sure! Now all I need is to have my hair colored. It’s been awhile since I had that done too. But I’ll have to wait until next time. Oh, well!

All in all, it was a good day. My kids and I were happy with our cuts and it only cost me a total of $45. That’s right! And that really put a big toothy smile on my face! :)

Reflection of a City

 

Silver Bean

 

Don't worry be happy...!

As I was waiting in the car for my son to come out from band practice, I saw the school’s principal. She started coming towards me. As I rolled down my window, she said hello and asked me if I had gotten a call from Ms. D. (the person handling the school’s invoices). Shit!

I tried to smile and told her if there was a message, I haven’t gotten it since I haven’t been home yet. But I knew exactly what she was referring to. Yes, I’m a couple months behind on the school payments. This sucks! It was so embarrassing! Here we are, (I work for a large firm and my husband has his own practice) and we’re behind in our payments. How did that happen?

My husband has been off for a couple of months, maybe more, giving back to the community. He’s always doing something to help others. But in the meantime, here we are falling behind. I don’t want to go into detail because it gets me upset. If I tell you why, then it makes me a selfish B-I-T-C-H!

Although here’s a quote that comes to mind. I heard it from a movie (I can’t remember which one since I only saw the end of it but I did write it down):

“If a problem can be solved, then why be unhappy? If a problem cannot be solved then what’s the use of being unhappy?”

I guess I really need to look into this…

Sorry, I’m just suffering from a bad case of PMS.

Kristy I read your blog...

Kristy, I read your blog today and I swear, I’m jealous! How do you do it? You have seven (seven) kids! And they are great! How are you able to manage your life and family? I only have two (my son whose 10 and my daughter is going on 13) and I can’t get a handle of anything! And for some reason or another, I can’t even get organized. I feel like I’m being pulled in four different directions (kids, husband, home and job!)

Even as I’m trying to type this up, I can hear my kids “mom!”

As soon as we get home, my kids are at it. They cannot do homework together as they are constantly distracting and fighting with each other and yet they won’t go to different rooms do their homework.

I feel like am trying to do too much and yet getting nothing accomplished!

I’m at the point where I feel my blood pressure rising!

Is it selfish to say “what about me?” When do I get a break?

Kristy you are a supermom. I truly admire you!

Any place but here...

Today, a friend of mine came back to work from a three-week vacation. Must be nice!

In talking to her, she mentioned how time just flew. It seemed she didn’t have enough days. She couldn’t believe she’s back – and she sure was not ready to come back to work.

Funny how when you think your life is good, and you come back from a vacation, you realize what the hell am I doing here?

Why does it feel like anywhere but here life is easier, enjoyable and more satisfying? Is the grass always greener on the other side?

And why is it that when you are having fun, time seems to slip away. And yet, when you are not, time goes in slow motion?

Well, I guess that’s why it’s called a vacation – you have fun while it lasts. And yes, sometimes you do need a vacation from your vacation!

Commenting on my cooking...

“If you eat it often enough, you’ll learn to like it.” By my 12 year old daughter.

Gee thanks.

Always on the run...!

Remember the cartoons where it showed a calendar flipping rapidly through the days to get to the next year? Or when you put a movie on fast forward? Well, that’s what my life feels like. I have this feeling as if I have been in a dream state and I just woke up and I missed out on things. I feel like I have been running all my life and I can’t catch up! Why does everything have to be done in a rush? This is a day in my life.

“Babe, it’s 6:30 a.m.! It’s time to get up now.” My husband says as he gets up to go the bathroom.

“Ugh! I don’t want to get up!” I say, as I cover my face with the pillow. I know I have to get up because if I don’t the kids won’t get up either. Then for sure we’ll be running late, as usual!

My neck feels stiff. I know I have to stretch out, but I get up and go downstairs instead. As I am walking out of my bedroom I yell out “come on kids, it’s time to get up, it’s almost 7 o’clock.” I can hear them stirring but they make no effort to get up. My daughter is still wrapped around her blanket. My son’s blanket is all over the floor and he’s spread out like an eagle.

I go downstairs and while my husband puts a pot of coffee on, I have to hurry to let the dogs out and fill their bowls with food and water.

I look at the clock. Oh, no, it’s 7:20 already! How could that be? The kids are waiting for their breakfast. I give them the quickest meal (heat up some French toast in the microwave or cold cereal). Will I ever get up early enough to give them a real hearty homemade breakfast?

While the kids are finishing their breakfast, I drink (more like swallow) a cup of coffee (I don’t know how many times I’ve burned my tongue and the roof of my mouth!). I know I have to get in the shower no later than 7:30. I’m thinking, hurry, hurry…. I have to get in the shower! Other times, if the kids don’t get up after a few “come on get up, we’re going to be late!” then everyone ends up having a stressful morning rushing out the door to get to school and work. And I know I have to catch my train or else I’ll miss it and be late for work.

By the time I get to work, I’m already stressed out. And to boot, when I get there, everything is urgent! Hurry, hurry, this has to get done now! This is quite urgent! I have a million and one things to do and they require immediate attention. Sometimes I wish I were an octopus so that I can finish it all at once! When I finally get to go to lunch (I get half hour) what do I do? If I don’t bring my lunch (which usually I don’t – believe me I’ve tried and it has not worked for me), I have to pick up something to eat. By the time I wait for the elevator, go down the elevator and pick a place to go eat, I’m already running out of time. Hurry… hurry….I have to get back to work! Since I only have coffee for breakfast, by lunchtime I’m feeling pretty hungry. When I sit down to eat, I eat so fast that when I look down my plate I’m like, “where’s my food?” I can’t believe I already finished it! And I don’t even know if I actually tasted the food! I can’t remember the last time I actually sat down and enjoyed a meal.

I get back to my desk to find another pile of work that’s urgent (it needs to go out before the end of my day). Nothing can wait, hurry, hurry….! When it’s finally time for me to leave, I walk out the door feeling drained. I’m yawning all the way to the train station to catch my train (the only good thing about the train ride is I actually get to enjoy reading a book even though half the time I’m falling asleep!).

Once I pick up the kids from school, we have to hurry to get home so that the kids can eat and start their homework. (we especially have to rush when they have practices or games). My daughter always has a lot of homework and has had trouble with some of the assignments. She’s good at taking notes, being neat and organized, but she still has trouble studying. She’s tried different ways to do it and as of yet, we still haven’t found the right study guide for her. My husband has no patience for it. He does not like explaining more than once, and when he sees that she is not “getting it” he loses his patience and starts getting angry with her. When I tried helping her, I practically end up doing her homework and that’s not good either! This creates so much tension between us. Thank goodness, a friend of ours has been kind enough to help tutor her. I am so glad! I believe it’s going to help her a great deal. I certainly hope so!

My son, he never seems to have any homework. He says he completes most of it at school. He’s like a sponge; he picks up on things quickly, especially when it peeks his interest. On the other hand, he’s total opposite of my daughter -- he’s sloppy! He’s had some missing assignments or late homework because he stuffs everything inside his backpack and/or he forgets to put his assignment in his homework folder. And when he does not understand an assignment or he does not like what he’s working on, he closes up, gets angry and upset. When I try to explain to him what I think he should be doing, he does not want to hear it. He’s very stubborn. So by the time we finish up for the day, I end up getting angry and upset with him too.

And housework, oh, that’s a whole other story. Unfortunately, I don’t have a dishwasher, so when I do dishes, I feel like I wash a hundred of them. Oh, those dirty dishes never seem to go away! That goes for my dirty laundry too. I finally give up!

I literally feel exhausted. I have no more energy. I am feeling tired, upset with myself because I know I need to change things….

I need help! Any suggestions, I will gladly take them.

Well, I have to get back to finishing my laundry. I’ll see if I can finish those darn dishes too! But I can’t promise it!

Chiquis

Chiquis was a little puppy just 2 months old when we brought her home. This was right after our beloved Chino passed away.

I named her Chiquis (short for Chiquita). She is a mix bread of Chihuahua and a hotdog and who knows what else. She is cute as a button.

During the time she has been with us, we soon realized that this family was not made to take care of small dogs. We've always had big dogs (Alaskan Husky and American Eskimo). She was so little that we kept stepping on her. We had to buy her a little collar with a bell so that we could hear her. But even then, we still kept on stepping on her. My son (who's pretty big and heavy for his age) loved to play with her. But at times, he was a little too rough. We had to explain to him that Chiquis was still a puppy and very little so he had to be careful with her.

Chiquis loved chasing after my son. One day, my son was playing around with her. She started chasing after him and in the course of running and chasing, Chiquis ran in between his legs, tripped him over and he fell on top of her. Sure enough Chiquis was crying with so much pain! Poor little Chiquis. We had to rush her to the Vet. Chiquis definitely had a broken leg! I could not believe this was happening. First Chino and now this....! Thank God he didn't crush her and killed her!

So here is little Chiquis with a cast on her leg. She cried out all night in pain. I wished I could have taken the pain away, but there was nothing I could do. I stayed up with her and tried to give her as much comfort as possible until finally she fell asleep.

The next day, she was walking around like nothing ever happened. She looked so cute with her little cast. By the third day, she was running around. I took her back to the Vet and he told me I should keep her in a kennel for awhile so she wouldn't run and reinjure her leg. I felt so bad for Chiquis when I had her locked in her little kennel. She did not like it at all. She kept crying and yelping and giving me those eyes like saying "please get me out of here!" But it was for her own good. A couple of weeks had past, she seemed to be getting used to being in the kennel. But when we would let her out, we had to keep her on a short leash as she would try to run for it!

One afternoon, I got her out of the kennel and was walking her. While walking, I noticed something different about her. I realized she did not have her cast on. I don't know how she did it, but she got it off. Of course her leg got a little thinner but not enough to have gotten the cast off by itself. I took her back to the Vet and again he told me keep her in her kennel she's healing well but she still has a few more weeks to go. So there was my little Chiquis back in a cast.

Soon the day came and she was freed from the darn cast. I could tell she was so excited. She started running around our yard like there was no tomorrow. She looked so cute. I was afraid for her because I didn't want her hurt again. Every time my kids had softball or soccer practice, I would try to take her to the park. She loved going for walks around the park. She looked so happy. And of course some of the kids at the park began to know her and like her. She even became the little mascot for my daughter's softball team. We made her a little red shirt to go with the color of her team.

My other pets (Beau and Coqueta) were too old to play with her. She would jump, bark and snip at them. I was afraid they would bite her and hurt her. But I knew Chiquis had to learn. She would especially jump and snap at Coqueta. You could see in Coqueta's face that she did not want to be bothered. She would growl and try to snap back at her but she never bit her. Chiquis just had too much energy. Or was it that Coqueta missed Chino? I remember when Chino first came to our family, he would try to get close to Coqueta and lay next to her and she would growl at him. I'll never forget when Chino kept persisting. He kept getting closer and closer. One day, I went inside the living room and there they were, Chino and Coqueta laying together asleep. With Beau, he had a hard time trying to make friends with. Beau actually bit him once and had to have stitches on his little face. But soon enough, they all became good buddies. They played together, ate together and slept together. Poor little Chino. He went through so much in his short life. I still miss him...:(


Well, back to Chiquis... as she was getting a little older, and I have to admit, we really didn't spend enough time with her to train her. She started to have accidents inside the house. When we first got her, both kids were fighting as to who will take care if her. Now they don't even want to let her out to pee. "No, it's not my turn, no it's your turn now"! I was the one who ended up letting her out, feeding her, walking her.

Even though we would take her out and stay with her until she did her duty, right after she would come inside the house, she would run to living room or dining room and pee. My husband would get so upset. He already did not like the fact that we kept stepping on her and her having had a broken leg. And too boot, she was starting to chew up our furniture! And our house was starting to smell like pee! He said "my dogs are already trained and know the routine. If this puppy doesn't get with it, I'm getting rid of her!" I was so upset. I tried working with her but she kept on peeing! So when we had to leave the house, we always kept her in her kennel. I felt bad, that's not a life for a puppy. After a few attempts to see if the kids would really do their part and take care of her, we decided it was time to teach them a lesson. I just didn't think it would happen that soon.

Last Saturday, we took Chiquis with us to my son's soccer game. After walking her around the park, I went to sit at the bleachers to watch the game. One of my son's teammates mother was there and she said, "Oh, that's such a cute puppy. I always wanted to have a little dog like her." My husband soon jumped to the conversation and said "you can take her home with you if you want her!" She was like "for real?" "Are you giving her away?" "Yes", said my husband. "We need to find her a new home. We are not a small dog family." I, for one, did not believe that we would actually give her away. This woman has four boys and they all fell in love with Chiquis instantly. She asked us again, "if you are sure, we would definitely want to keep her, but what about your kids, won't they be sad?" I told her "no, they're always fighting as to whose turn it is to take her out. They don't really seemed to want to take care of her." We talked a little while longer about the kids and Chiquis and soon her kids took a hold of Chiquis's leash and started to walk away. I felt sad, but I had a very good feeling that she was going to be better off with this new family. "Chiquis I hope you have a good life!" as she walked away not even looking back!

My kids were quiet for awhile. At first I didn't think it phased them. Once we got home and got settled, they were like "mom, I can't believe you just gave her away!". "How could you!" Now they realized how much Chiquis meant to them, and that it takes work to take care of a pet, especially a little puppy, but it's a little too late. Hope they learned their lesson.

Yesterday, we saw Chiquis at my son's soccer game since the day she left us. She seemed so happy, running around playing with her new family. I went up to her and as soon as she saw me, she jumped up at me, I picked her up and she excitedly licked my face. I felt happy to know that she had not forgotten me.

It was almost time to go. The lady had to take her son to the bathroom and asked her other son to hold on to Chiquis. As soon as she started to walk away, Chiquis began to cry for her. I called to Chiquis and said "come here Chiquis, come to momma"! Chiquis turned to me and gave me a look that said "no, you gave me away remember? You see that lady walking away from me, she's my new mommy now!" She turned her back to me and kept crying for her. I was like o.k. Should I be happy or sad? I actually felt a little jealous! I had a mixed feeling of happines because I knew that meant she was happy in her new home. But yet I felt sad because I know now that she no longer belongs to us!

Farewell my little one!

Goodbye my puppy

About eight months ago we had gotten a puppy from a friend. He was a Labrador and was so sweet with those fluffy ears. We named him Chino (which has different meanings to some folks but I gave him that name because chino also means curly). His ears were so soft, fluffy and curly. He was the sweetest most adorable puppy. We all fell in love with him, but mostly my daughter, he soon became her best friend.

Let me tell you about Chino. After 3 or 4 months of having Chino join our family, we discovered a lump on his back. We soon took him to the hospital. Doctor's said it was just a benign lump and they removed it. They did not know exactly why he developed that lump. After the surgery, he seemed to recover quickly. A few days later, I noticed his stitches were not healing properly. I took him back to the hospital. He had developed an infection. The doctors had to put two tubes to drain the wound. So he was walking around with an open wound. It was so disgusting. But that did not seem to affect Chino in any way whatsoever. He was his usual happy go lucky puppy. He loved going for walks and he loved going to the park. He enjoyed playing, running and the attention the children gave him at the park. Within a couple of weeks, his wound began to heal.

One day over a long weekend (this was a Saturday and Monday was a holiday), I noticed he wasn't his usual self. He was not very playful and was not eating much. I thought maybe he was too tired from running around all day with the kids. Sunday, came and he seemed to want to sleep a lot. By Monday, I knew something was really wrong as he was just laying there not wanting to do much. His eyes looked sad. Tuesday morning came and I rushed him to the hospital. They kept him there for testing and observation. After work, I went straight the hospital to see Chino. The doctor came out and told me "he does not look good, seems like your puppy has been poisoned." I could not believe what I was hearing! "What do you mean he was poisoned!" How? The doctor indicated that he would run some test but somehow Chino ate poison. He said it could have been anything from household chemicals to plants that can potentially be poisonous to some animals. My heart just sank. My poor Chinito! The doctor asked me to come by tomorrow and check up on him. They next day I rushed to the hospital right after work. The doctor came out with Chino on a leash and he said "Chino's prognosis does not look good." Apparently, the poison already invaded his liver. "Take him for a walk, it will do him some good." So I took Chino outside and walked with him. He looked up at me with such sad eyes (which still brings tears to mine as I am typing this) but I knew he appreciated the walk. We took short walks around the block since he seemed to tire easily. Finally I bent down to his eye level and said "Chino, you brought much joy to me and my family. You are a very good puppy. I know how much you love to walk. So this may be our last walk together. I love you!"

I tried to be strong and not cry but tears rolled down my cheeks. People were passing me by probably wondering what was wrong. As I wiped my tears and took a deep breath trying to compose myself, I took Chino back inside. The doctor took him back and asked that we come to see him again the next day.

Soon the next day came. My daughter and my husband went to see him earlier that morning. My husband called me at work. He sounded sad and I could hear my daughter in the background crying. I wanted to rush out of there to be with my daughter. My husband said that Chino look worse. He was not moving at all. He said to hurry home so we can go see again.

I left as soon as I could and when we got to the hospital Chino was gone. He had passed away....

My daughter cried and cried. She kept sobbing and asking "Why? Why? Why did he have to die!" I could not do anything. What could I say? What could I tell her that will make her feel better. It tore my heart out to see her in so much pain. I saw tears in my husband eyes and my son was trying to stay strong but he too had tears in his eyes.

The doctor took us into the room where they kept Chino. He said to my daughter, "Chino was waiting for you. He held on until you came to see him. After you left he passed away."

My poor baby girl. It just broke my heart to see her that way. I know how she loved Chino. She had already planned on how to dress him up for Halloween. I hugged her and cried with her. I tried to explain to her that even though Chino had a short life he had a good life with us. We gave him a chance to have a family and a home. Chino was waiting for her so he can say goodbye, he got a chance to see her one last time before he passed and he died happy knowing that he made her happy. I think she understood what I was trying to say. But I knew she needed to grieve.

As we were leaving, the doctor came with a little tiny puppy. He said "take her with you, she's the last of the bunch. It might help your kids cope with the pain. If you decide to keep great, if not, you can always bring her back."

Still today, the mentioned of Chino will bring tears to my daughter's eyes. On October 11 he would have been 9 months old. This was truly the saddest experience my kids have had.

Well, as you can guess, we walked out of there with a new puppy...but that's another story!